It Took Us 12 Minutes to Figure Out Who This Woman Is
Who the fuck is this very famous woman I feel as though I’ve known all my life but somehow cannot recognize? Mom?!
Celebrities
Friday morning began easily enough until I—against my better judgment and in spite of everything I’ve learned over the last decade of my life—signed onto Twitter. Immediately, I was ambushed with photos of a blonde woman who looked extremely familiar yet completely unplaceable. Was she an actress? A morning host? A housewife? The wife of an actress? A morning host? A housewife’s ex-husband?
Then I noticed the Republic Records step and repeat—maybe she’s a songwriter? A producer? Is she the president of Republic Records? Who the fuck is this woman I feel as though I’ve known all my life? Mom?!
I stared for what felt like hours. Nothing. I asked my co-workers if they could guess who this was. Surely I was just tired—I had some weird dreams last night so maybe that was messing with my people-recognition-functionality or whatever. But sure enough, my co-workers were just as perplexed: Guesses varied from Bebe Rexha to Maria Menounos to Paula Abdul to Selma Blair to Shakira. We KNEW we all recognized this very famous person—yet not one of us could name her.
Ok, I’ll tell you: It is SHANIA TWAIN. Did you guess this correctly?! If you did, can you DM me and explain exactly what feature gave it away for you? Because I’m still staring at it and going, “Wait, who?!?!?!”
Twain has been wearing a ton of wigs lately; she wore a soft pink wig to the People’s Choice Awards in December; a bright pink one on the Today show in January; a curly brown one on The Kelly Clarkson Show Thursday—and she looks great in all them! But she still looks like Shania Twain in those. God I hope I look this good in 20 years, though maybe slightly less Uncanny Valley.
Anyway, this was fun. Twain looks incredible if not entirely herself. (Also, while we’re here, she released an entire album—her first since 2017’s Now—Friday, called Queen of Me. Which is why she’s been out and about and photographed so much!)
So, if you immediately knew it was Shania, then you just got to enjoy reading a little more about her. And if you didn’t guess it was her, now you know. You may proceed with your weekend.