If Rudy Giuliani wasn’t a total scumbag, actively working to make the world a worse place each and every day, it would be tempting to feel a bit bad for the guy at this point. In this horrible Season Of Giuliani, the man has: 1) Been caught trying to take his dick out in front of a woman he thought was a journalist, 2) Ended up holding a press conference in the parking lot of the prestigious Four Seasons Total Landscaping, and 3) Made a desperate attempt to justify a legal case for election fraud by leaking wet Sharpie from his head and quoting My Cousin Vinny.
It’s been a hell of a season for Rudy already, but say this for the collection-of-horse-carcass-parts-stuffed-into-a-leathery-human-shaped-sack: There are always new things to make fun of him for. Consider last night’s concentration on Giuliani’s bewildering shoes—a pair of Kingdom Hearts-style kicks that force us to imagine a world where Ed Gein got into the clown shoe business.
After Jason Concepcion shared a close-up of the Rudy Shoelianis worn by the former New York City mayor in a photo from last month, the internet latched onto a new reason to laugh at Giuliani. There are references to Goofy and N64 games as well as Mario comparisons, lovingly brought to life through beautiful Photoshop jobs.
The shoes also call to mind Muppets and those who help out wooden dolls that want to be real boys, but the best non-cartoon image associations are with loaves of bread or hunks of ground meat.
If it was anyone but Giuliani, we’d assume these would be among the last instances of wide-spread public mockery he’d face this year. But no. For as long as the baseless voter fraud case continues, so, too, will the Season Of Giuliani.
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